Written By: Sebastian Barnum Photos By: Emily Rex
View all of Emily's them Crooked Vultures photos here.
Portland, OR - So here’s the story of my life. I waited for four hours in a line of awkward middle-aged people interspersed with diehard fans only to get in the building and find out that the venue lost my tickets. After waiting for 25 minutes, the lady realized that they were hiding under her big, fat floppy grandma bingo wing arms, and she kindly apologizes, as I head upstairs to a sold out show, which I am in the ass end of. However there is a light at the end of every tunnel (as long as it’s not night time.)
After sitting through what was an admittedly terrible opening band doing 80’s cover songs for 30 minutes, the lights came up and I felt hope again. Then I noticed a security guard I knew smiling at me, I asked for a favor, and he took me to the front of the crowd. Then, after waiting for a few minutes, the lights went down. As soon as Dave Grohl almost fell over his drums, and John Paul Jones Played a ten string slide bass, all the crap from earlier just melted away.
Needless to say, a band with a god, a legend and a madman is going to be quite awesome. However, I can promise you, I was blown away. I completely underestimated Josh Holm as both a front man and a guitar player. He was fantastic, and it’s a shame he is more famous for his random outbursts at audiences than anything else. Dave Grohl was fantastic. I have never seen a drummer with that level of energy having such precision and accuracy with his instrument. Of course, the most impressive person of the evening was Mr. John Paul Jones. His sheer mastery of not only bass, but also the piano was exhilarating, and stunning at the same time.
Because the album had only come out four days prior to the show, the crowd was total crap. At one point Josh turned to the audience and asked “You guys still with us?” It was clear that those who were there, including me, were attending purely out of respect and admiration for the musicians rather than the music. However, the show that was put on by this fantastic trio was amazing none the less. I would say it was the third best show I have ever seen, which is quite a statement.
The set was essentially the band’s first album on shuffle, but that’s not to say it was no better than listening to the recording. The album in no way captures the heavy, funky, grimy, energetic sound that is “Them Crooked Vultures.” There were a few moments that completely made the evening; the most memorable would be Josh’s drunken performance of “Interlude With Ludes,” a Hawaiian sounding song that resembles both an acid trip and an orgasm. He began by playing the slide guitar intro, then quickly put down the guitar, picked up a beer, and began to hula.
Another aspect that made the show great, were these two moments during songs during which the band would just start making stuff up. Not to seem cliché, but it was very “Zeppelin-esque.” Between Holms intricate and flawless guitar work, Grohls pounding of the drums like a pissed off teenager, and Jones’ funky bass riffs, it fit perfectly into that delicate gap between chaos and beauty.Finally, as this evening seemed to be past the point of perfection, John Paul Jones sat down at his piano, and played the most gorgeous melody. It was reminiscent of “No Quarter” but this piece clearly had its very own motif. As he played through the intro of “Spinning In Daffodils” I couldn’t help but be moved, that was until Josh Holm and Dave Grohl begin the pounding and grinding that could make a mute cry out in anticipation. After they completed that song, they moved on to the finale (Gunman,) at which point Jones picks up the most incredible bass ever created. A custom made ten string bass that lights up when you hit a note. I felt like a child staring at a ray gun.
All in all, the evening was fantastic. Once I moved on from the crappy circumstances and went on to the jaw dropping band, everything seemed to work out. The band was flawless, and that was from the perspective of someone who really didn’t expect anything from Josh Holm, and knew none of the songs on the set. As a person who is now a diehard fan of both the musicians and the music, I can promise you, you don’t want to miss this band.
